No, all I require from you, my dear friends, this season of love and giving of oneself for the good of others, is a SHINY NEW CAR THAT WILL NOT BREAK DOWN IN THE POURING RAIN TWO MINUTES FROM HOME SO THAT I HAVE TO LEAVE IT FULL OF MY STUFF ON THE SIDE OF THE HIGHWAY AND FULL OF FEAR THAT IT WILL BE TOWED BEFORE I HAVE THE TIME TO GET IT.
That is all.
P.S: In the event that you can not afford a shiny new car, I will accept any of the other listed gift options.
P.P.S: A woman named "Tanya" has sent me e-mail with this subject: "Re: bruce cerise goliath"
There are no words.