"Or helping the elderly cross the street"
was translated as:
"Oder dem älteren Kreuz helfend die Straße."
Which means "Or helping the elderly cross the street", except that elderly is not the subject, nor is cross the verb. Cross, in fact, is the subject, elderly is DESCRIBING the cross, and helping is the verb. So, in other words, the sentance is telling you about the really old crucifix that's helping the street.
I LUV YOU BABELFISH!!!!!!!