Your Face (kandigurl) wrote,
Your Face

I started moving around furniture in my apartment to make it look like a legitimate living space last night! My TV is all hooked up with my shiny new VCR! It makes the tapes I watch not look like crap. HOORAY!

I also went out and bought a crapload of yarn for folks who want scarves, and also some yarn for MEEEEEEE. I got me some pretty pretty sock yarn I've had my eye on for months, and I know exactly what socks I'm going to make with it! I'm supar pumped, but I've got to finish my other pair first.

GUYS WE GOT ROCKBAND AT THE HOUSE. THAT SHIT IS ADDICTIVE, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. I think it's WORSE than Guitar Hero, and I couldn't say exactly how, it just is. We played it until 7 AM Saturday morning. We were rocking and rolling and all of a sudden we notice Channa coming down stairs and we look out the window and HEY WHAT IS THAT IS IT THE SUN and oh, shit, looks like we didn't get any sleep. Saturday was fun, I'll tell you that, what with all the ridiculous lack of sleep. I find I'm more social and jovial when I haven't slept at all! Maybe that's a good indication of what I'd be like if I were drunk. So now you know.

Today's and the weekend's were BOTH AWESOME, I skipped the weekend last week because it was meh, but I'm posting it today because I like it.

TODAY'S IS THE ABSOLUTE BEST, THOUGH. Read the story. It just gets weirder and weirder as it goes along. It starts with a dentist and ends in NAZIS.

pollincter: One who prepares materials for embalming the dead; [from] Latin pollinctus, French polingere, to wash and prepare a corpse for a funeral.

Distasteful Dental Display
On this date in 1775 Mary Van Buren, wife of London dentist Martin Van Buren (ME HERE: IS THIS THE FUTURE PRESIDENT'S GREAT GRANDDAD OR SOMETHING?), died of undisclosed causes. Not wishing to miss an opportunity to promote his practice, Van Buren decided to have her body embalmed by the noted anatomist Dr. William Hunger, who added "nicely matched glass eyes," and cheek rouge to reinvigorate her ashen skin. After outfitting the corpse in lace, the dentist offered it for public inspection in his home office daily from nine o'clock until one, except Sundays. Although his marketing plan drew many gawkers, his second wife was quick to object, and the body was removed to Hunter's museum of anatomical oddities, which still operates as the Hunterian Museum in the Royal College of Surgeons in London's Lincoln's Inn Fields. But this corpse is not among the exhibits, having fallen victim to an errant Nazi bomb in 1941, after which the remains were properly buried.

fletcherize: To chew thoroughly.

Death of Horace Fletcher (1849 - 1919), wealthy, self-proclaimed American health messiah, who was known as the "Great Masticator" and the "chew-chew man." Wafter being denied a life insurance policy at age forty-four because of his obesity, he wrote a number of books focusing on diet and digestion. He recommended that if food was chewed until all flavor was gone the "swallowing impulse" would do the rest. In England, the well-to-do in particular heeded the advice of Edward VII's physician, a follower of Fletcher, and began hosting "munching parties" in which guests used stopwatches to time one another while chewing snacks. Fletcher's religious zeal was widely heralded by dozens of popular periodicals, and even a few serious ones such as the Lancet. The December 1908 issue of Cosmopolitan quoted him as making such outlandish statements as "Most people are human sewers...Cannibals, I am told, always bolt their missionary." John Harvey Kellogg, the "King of Cornflakes," is credited with introducing the Americanism to fletcherize.

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