WARNING: THIS POST IS ABOUT GLENN BECK

Guys, Glenn Beck spells his name with two "n"s. I am only pointing this out because...I noticed it when I typed his name in the subject line and I like the double "n" thing. IT'S A THING. A THING WITH TWO "N"S.

ANYWAY.

The thing is, GLENN MOTHERFUCKING* BECK is going to be signing his ENLIGHTENING NEW BOOK (which totally beat out Colbert's book on the New York Times best seller's list the first week it was out) in FRIGGEN' DALLAS TEXAS ON SATURDAY.

What I'm saying here is, I'm going. WHAT SHOULD I CRAFT FOR HIM OUT OF DUCT TAPE AS AN EARLY CHRISTMAS GIFT? THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT QUESTION. I AM TAKING SUGGESTIONS.

gutterballjen GUTTERBAJILLION, as the only person on my fl who actually knows who Glenn Beck is outside of my inane ramblings, WOULD YOU LIKE TO COME ALONG???? I am inviting my mother, too. ONLY THE HEPPEST OF HEP CATS GO TO GLENN BECK BOOK SIGNINGS.

It is from 11 to noon at the Barnes and Noble at THIS ADDRESS:

7700 W Northwest Hwy
Dallas, TX 75225

I AM PUMPED ABOUT THIS

HOW PUMPED?

PUMPED ENOUGH FOR LIBERAL CAPSLOCK USEAGE

EDIT: Man, he is beating the PANTS off Colbert on Barnes and Noble's best seller list! (I have absolutely nothing against Colbert's book, in fact, I really want to buy it, too, I just love Glenn more and beating Colbert is kind of like his little benchmark even though that book has been out way longer and he needs to feel special somehow. I <3 YOU GLENN)





*I sincerely doubt that Glenn Beck actually fucks mothers. Well, the mother of his children, but...you know...they're married.