It is my irrational fear of needles, you see. There is the rational fear part of the brain, where it's all, "Yes, I can see being afraid of something they poke through your skin," and then there's my fear, which is the irrational one, which takes that rational fear and multiplies it by eight BILLION.
I made it through yesterday in once piece, nearly breaking down a little at the mere thought that shots were going on? But I got through it, thinking, at least it's over until next year.
And then the lady that brings me my paperwork came in today and asked me if I'd gotten my flu shot, and I said, "Nonononononononononono. And no." I explained the fear thing.
She told me don't worry, she would go with me next year and hold my hand, and I tried to explain to her that no, really, NO, no, really, I mean, just, no. But after about five minutes of explanation, she left with a casual pat of my hand saying, "Don't worry, we'll take care of you next year."
And then I went to the bathroom and CRIED at the THOUGHT of possible shots NEXT YEAR.
I am so lame.