I have been sucked into a study group.
AFTER SWEARING WITH ALL THE SWEARS IN ME THAT I WOULD DO NO SUCH THING.
This is what comes of knowing what the hell is going on. And attending class all the way through instead of just leaving when the quiz was over, like I TOTALLY SHOULD HAVE DONE. I didn't learn a fucking thing I didn't already know in accounting today. Instead, during the GOD FORSAKEN GROUP WORK THAT DIDN'T EVEN COUNT FOR A GRADE, I made the mistake of giving the "scribe" all the answers because I just wanted to get it overwith, for christ's sake, so we could all leave.
And sure enough, SURE ENOUGH, as I was gathering all my things to leave the classroom, two of the girls from my stupid group said, "Hey, Jess, do you think we could all get together and study before the test?"
Okay. OKAY. I KNOW what that really means. I can interpret your twisted use of the english language. What you REALLY mean is, "Hey, can you come waste a few hours of your free time, which is so absurdly limited it's not even funny, so that you can explain to us what the hell is going on, because we don't know, even though those hours will have ABSOLUTELY NO BENEFIT WHATSOEVER FOR YOU AS YOU ALREADY KNOW ALL THE INFORMATION REQUIRED TO FUCKING ACE THE TEST?????"
I should have said no. I should have said, "Gee, you know, I'd LOVE to, but I'm really really busy." I should have AT LEAST said, "Yeah, if you buy me dinner, I'll help you study."
But you know what? These girls seemed NICE. They didn't seem like bitches. It would have been so much easier to say no if they seemed like the bitches that couldn't have cared less if I existed in high school. But they seemed like DECENT FUCKING HUMAN BEINGS.
And the soft side of me that JUST CAN'T SAY NO TO ANYTHING, said, "Um, sure, I have some free time Saturday evening."
NEVER MIND THAT THAT FREE TIME WOULD HAVE BEEN SPENT HAVING A FEW HOURS TO MY FUCKING SELF THAT WASN'T OTHERWISE DEVOTED TO WORK OR SCHOOL, AND THAT THOSE FEW HOURS TO MYSELF WOULD HAVE TAKEN UP ABOUT A THIRD OF THE FREE TIME I GET FOR THE WEEK.
I am such a fucking moron, and I hate everything. Yes, even YOU.