March 2nd, 2015

Tree Dreaming

Gettin' Butthurt on the Internet

So Gary posted in the LJI Green Room about an issue I'd never personally heard of, but figured my SJW friends would have a lot of Things To Say about, were it brought up. The issue in question being: Is it okay for allies to use the phrase "coming out" to announce their support for the LGBTQ community?

For reasons I'm not entirely sure of, I re-posted the issue to my FB asking for opinions.

Sure enough, the exact people I thought would take issue came in with flowery-worded comments about how it is SO WRONG and people should be SUPER ASHAMED AND KNOW BETTER.

Ultimately, I got that overwhelming feeling I get so many times during these discussions - that nitpicking the wrong- or right-ness of an issue dissolves its meaning.

I'm reading all of these comments by people who feel VERY STRONGLY that ANYONE who would do this particular thing is an ASSHOLE.

And I mean - probably, those people are trying to NOT be an asshole.

I can't help feeling like everyone throwing such a huge shit-fit about which terms are the right terms, and how everyone should know EVERY TERM EVERY TIME or else they're an INSENSITIVE DICKHEAD might actually be turning potential allies away. "This shit's too complicated for me, man. Don't want to say the wrong thing and get eaten alive."

I wouldn't blame them. I don't even enjoy throwing in my two cents in discussions of this sort due to the crazy "know the right words and exactly how to say them or you're not allowed to have an opinion" witch hunt that ensues. For all their talk of "derailing discussion", I feel like this constant fear of saying the wrong thing derails way more discussions than it starts.