November 21st, 2010

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Tomorrow will be DAY TEN

Okay so I already failed out of LJ Idol by having way too much to do this week and completely forgetting about it. Which is also why I didn't update about day seven or eight of my yoga. They were actually pretty good days, with pretty good, strong classes. It's nice to have those once in a while so you don't feel like you're this useless waste of a person that will never improve. Today was not quite so strong, but not terrible. This was the first time I went to class in the middle of the day rather than first thing in the morning. You see, the past three days have looked like this:

THURSDAY: Get up at 8 AM, go to yoga at 9:30 AM, do yoga, go to lunch with my mom, go home, putter about and make hoops until 5 PM when I go to work, work until 10:30 PM, leave work, go to Irving to see the MIDNIGHT SHOWING OF HARRY POTTER, see the midnight showing of Harry Potter, go home and get in bed around 4 AM.

FRIDAY: Get up at 8 AM, go to yoga at 9:30 AM, do yoga, come home and change clothes, go to work at 1 PM, work until 6 PM, come home and take a one hour nap, wake up around 8ish at friends knocking on my door, ride with said friends to SEE THE FUCKING DRESDEN DOLLS, see the fucking Dresden Dolls, wait around for Amanda Palmer to appear, wait in line to fondle Amanda Palmer, fondle Amanda Palmer, allow friends to drive me back home, climb into bed around 4 AM.

SATURDAY (TODAY): Decide there's no fucking way I'm getting up to go to yoga at 8 AM (as there is no 9:30 class on Saturday), and sleep until 10:30, get out of bed to plan my hoop class for the day, teach said hoop class at noon, stick around after for friend's poi class, leave after to go to yoga at 3 PM, do yoga, leave immediately after yoga to go to work at 5 PM, get to work late, work until 10:30 PM, come home.

I AM TIRED. I flunked out of LJ Idol and I'm agonizingly behind on NaNoWriMo, and I don't even care. Luckily, I have the next two days off, and I'm doing nothing but going to yoga and maybe write a little bit. WE'LL SEE.

So today's day nine post isn't so much reflections as things I've noticed during certain postures that I'd like to write about for the sake of future Day-60-Jess. But FIRST, I would like to mention that after tomorrow's class, I will have gone to ten days of yoga in a row, which they always tell you that you should do, especially as a beginner. And I have never, ever, ever done it. I think the most days in a row I've gone to yoga is five, MAYBE seven. I don't know. I always get tired of it and let myself skip a day. If I weren't doing the challenge, I probably would have already skipped a day. Maybe four days. There have definitely been days when I woke up in the morning (Particularly Friday) when I was like, "Am I REALLY going to get up and do this to myself today?" Yes. Yes I am. EVERY DAY FOR SIXTY DAYS. I've even picked out the studio I'm going to take class at when I'm in Austin for Hoop Path in December.

Anyway, without further ado, Collapse )
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Day Ten - Heavy Thoughts

So here's something that is true, yet difficult to control, especially when you really want to. If you surrender to the posture and go into it with strength and good form, the pose will be easier than if you let yourself think about how much it will hurt or how tired you'll be or how you have to do this, and THEN the next pose, and THEN the next pose...your thoughts are always heavier than your body can ever be. They will pull you down, collapse you out of pose after pose, make you feel like you're fighting against four hundred extra pounds of pressure.

Try telling yourself the pose is easy right before you go into it, even if your heavy thoughts are pushing you to just sit down and give yourself a break. "This pose is easy, I can do it comfortably." And then do it.

That being said, day ten for me was another struggle of a class. Fighting against old habits, coming out of postures I've been doing pretty well at holding strong through. But every class is different, and I shouldn't let myself get all hung up on how I "should" be doing, but rather, how I AM doing.

It's tough, though. Sometimes it's hard for me to tell what is me letting my body be what it is today, and what is me letting myself go easy when I could be putting in more effort. I'm letting today be what it was because, really, I've had an exhausting past few days. I'm not going to do much of anything today besides chill at home and enjoy the day.