August 3rd, 2007

Tree Dreaming

A weird dream...

So I was in some sort of gym/laundromat thing, and Jeffrey was there, too, and we decided we hated the owner so we were going to fill his car with leaves. (?) So Jeffrey went and did that, while I wandered around shopping at the gym/laundromat gift shop, which largely consisted of preservatives.

We were getting ready to leave, because clearly shopping for jam at a gym-laundromat hybrid was not enough to hold our interest, when an announcement came over the loud speakers that they had caught someone on camera filling the owner's car with leaves, and there it was, clear as day, Mr. Jeffrey was the only culprit, so I told him, "Don't worry, I'll pay half the fine."

I was too paranoid to leave out the front door, though, as I was an accomplice in the crime, so I snuck out the back door. There, I found my good friend from high school, Kelly Bell, five months pregnant and getting into a car with her family.

I freaked out, because I haven't seen her in a billion years, and we hugged and exchanged phone numbers and all that jazz and I made her SWEAR she'd keep in touch this time. She had two little boys. Who knows why.

THE POINT IS OH MAN KELLY BELL WHERE ARE YOU I MISS YOU SO BAD. YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO BE PREGNANT IF YOU DON'T WANT.

Collapse )
Tree Dreaming

A CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE! (Or, a choose SOMEONE ELSE'S adventure?)

So syntheticjesso's friend, patrick___, is totally doing an office-themed Choose-Your-Own-Adventure on his lj, which you should totally check out. TOTALLY. It is witty and entertaining.

It turns out, in a bizarre twist of events, that I am a horrendous, bitch-tastic copy-cat! Or you could also say that, as an immense form of flattery, I find the idea brilliant and wish to imitate it. The choice is yours.

As is the outcome of the following story! It also turns out that I'm entirely uncreative and incapable of coming up with new characters, so I present you with:

The Everyday, Not-So-Common Adventures of Joey Spicklespackle, a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure (For Real, this time!)
To continue on for as long as I'm not bored with it. Updated as often as the whimsy strikes.


Hi. I'm Joey Spicklespackle. You may know me from such films as "Gone With The Wind", which I watched once in kindergarten and didn't like all that much. It seems I'm not very good at dictating the events that occur in my own life, because every time I do, I get embroiled in nasty love spells with overzealous witches, or whisked away on a llama-propelled spaceship or something.

Frankly, dudes, I'm sick of it! So I'm giving up the reins to my life, starting right now. I'm turning my life over to YOU, the internet, because you've done a really good job at making decisions so far! Look at WebMD! Wikipedia! Potter Puppet Pals! I'm putting all of my trust and faith and vital organs in your hands. I believe in you. Do not let me down. It'd be a real blow to my self-esteem if you knowingly lead me into danger just to see if I'd do it, because I know me, and I would. And don't take that as an open invitation to test that theory! I'm for serious here, guys. Not even kidding. Not even a little bit.

Okay, let's get this gigantic human-shaped experiment started, now, shall we?

Right now, I'm sitting at home. My house is pretty cool, I guess, full of life-sustaining food and entertaining puzzles. Sadly, I live alone. For a while there, I used to have a brother, but I don't like to talk about it. The only break in the overwhelming, penetrating silence around here is when my best friend Dritz or my girlfriend Goatsie come to visit. Right now, they're not here. I kind of miss them, it'd be cool if they came by, you know, to chat.

I'm also kind of hungry, and could totally go for a sandwich, but that choice lies entirely in your hands!

It wouldn't kill me to go to the bathroom, either.

Poll #1032970 What should I do???

What should I do???

Go to the bathroom
3(20.0%)
Get distracted by and perseverate over some stains on the carpet
5(33.3%)
Call Drizt and Goatsie and invite them over
4(26.7%)
Make a sandwich
3(20.0%)