The best part about Ohio is that it has this amazing creation called "the internet" that I have not seen with my very own eyes EVER AT ALL.
After reading through recent posts to AnnE's livejournal, I've decided I hate her immensly because she's massively popular with the nerd community. I've decided to create my own posse of invisible polar bears that worship me and are constantly saying things like, "Chewbob, you are the SHIT, how can we be like you?" And I will respond with things like "Well, the secret is to never wash your clothes EVER, eat ONLY food from restaurants with a vowel in the name, and make up random songs about things that are currently happening."
The polar bears will then break dance for my amusement while baking me cake. CAKE WITH NO ICING, JUST HOW I LIKE IT. OR POSSIBLY NOT EVEN BAKING IT AT ALL.
Anyway, the trip to Ohio was awesome because we went to see Lincoln's Birthplace (AnnE did not want to go last year because she is an unbelievable hooker). We were expecting a man standing next to a log saying, "This may or may not have been in the cabin where Lincoln may or may not have been born THIRTY DOLLARS PLEASE."
What we got was a HUGE FREAKING MONUMENT SURROUNDING THE ACTUAL CABIN IN WHICH LINCOLN WAS BORN. Then we watched an educational film on Lincoln's first few years of life.
And my grampa told the best joke ever: "Well, Mrs. Lincoln, other than that, what did you think of the play?"
I'm still laughing. You can probably hear it from over the internet. If you cannot, you are square.
I'm sorry this post is long. I'm sorry if you read the whole thing expecting something interesting. You will be refunded your five minutes at the door.